And there are three further species, though one is extinct. Read on …….

Birds of a feather flock together. There are enough ostriches to keep the vultures happy for the time being, their relationship to date has been symbiotic. Roosters (who naturally enough are mostly male) are aware however that if vultures don’t clean up their act and/or if ostriches (who vastly outnumber the other species and are mostly female) fail to heed their call, then both roosters and ostriches will join the DODOS.

Roosters understand that the essential business of the state regarding the psy field is taxidermy (also known as regulation). Ostriches, say the roosters, had their heads in the sand in 2005 when the Department of Health launched a “Mapping Exercise” to get information on their breeding grounds. The forthcoming Professional Liason Group will help line up the psychological therapies for capture guided by the Health Professions Council's recent “Call for Ideas”. N.B. Only certain kinds of ideas are being sought. Roosters won't cooperate with such “consultations”, regarding them as a coercive sham.

The intended shape of things to come is already evident to roosters in the competency grids for the four modalities to be recognised for the purposes of stuffing. Vultures who have gained entry to Expert Reference Groups are collaborating with the state to breed a fifth bird, their bird of the future, the branded TURKEY.

Previously isolated, roosters are now gathering in sufficient numbers and particularly welcome ostriches who can raise their heads and aspire to become FLAMINGOS. A first act of sticking the neck out would be to sign the online petition against state regulation. Are there more birds in the closet who have yet to peck their keypad? A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.

Early in 2009 roosters will be going public with a major initiative. Cock a doodle do! Ostriches, watch your inbox, especially if you want to become flamingos. Drop us a line if you'd like to be invited, but not if you want to join the dodos or administer the turkey farms.